Subway and chopsticks

"And I find chopsticks frankly distressing.  Am I alone in thinking it odd that a people ingenious enough to invent paper, gunpowder, kites and any number of other useful objects, and who have a noble history extending back 3,000 years haven't yet worked out that a pair of knitting needles is no way to capture food? " ~Bill Bryson

I'm not sure how Jared did it.  How was he able to live off of Subway everyday, twice a day?  I have had Subway twice today and I am done with Subway for the week. Seriously, how did he do that?  

So, I have discovered the Subway diet is not for me. I think I might consider eating all my food with chopsticks.  I'm thinking if I can't get the food to my mouth, I am bound to lose weight.  

Who am I kidding? I'll throw done the sticks and eat it with my hands!